Freaky Friday Files: The Burnt Toast Theory

Hi friends! Happy Fri-YAY! In this week's edition of Freaky Friday Files, we're going to take a look at the burnt toast theory. I've been wanting to do some shorter Freaky Friday Files for a while and I think that things like this are just perfect.

If you want to check out some of my previous Freaky Friday Files you can do so below:

• Freaky Friday Files: The Amazon Killer (6 min read)

• Freaky Friday Files: The SOS Incident (3 min read)

• Freaky Friday Files: Mysteries That Probably Won't Ever Be Solved (5 min read)

  
  

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The Burnt Toast Theory

You might be wondering, Ashy, what the h*ck is the burnt toast theory? Or, maybe you're super TikTok savvy and already know what I'm talking about. Anyway, the burnt toast theory posits that any minor inconvenience e.g., burning your toast when you're late to work in the morning is the universe's way of diverting you from a catastrophe. It has become a common theory to discuss on platforms such as TikTok and YouTube. However, its roots stem from the "blessing in disguise" idiom i.e., that something that appears to be a misfortune would have unexpected benefits. I am unable to find who specifically on TikTok came up with the name "burnt toast theory" but it's been circulating the internet since 2023.

Phillips (2023) says "Picture this: you’re making toast in the morning and it burns. Although this is an objectively small issue, the whole process has made you late. You’re stressed, but en route to your destination, you witness a car accident, and upon hearing the details of the crash, you realise that had you left on time, it could have been you.

This forms the basis of the theory, which – in short – encourages us to reframe daily mishaps and failures by teaching us to look at them from a different perspective, namely under the belief that everything that happens is part of a bigger plan for your life."

So essentially, everything happens for a reason?

Well, of course, it depends on your beliefs. But, this burnt toast theory may have some truth to it. Let's explore some examples.

Examples of Burn Toast Theory

• Celebrities such as Seth MacFarlane, Michael Jackson, and Mark Wahlberg were meant to be at the World Trade Center when the 9/11 terror attack happened. MacFarlane and Wahlberg were meant to be on a flight there, but they both didn't get on that infamous flight 11. MacFarlane was hungover and ended up getting to the airport late, so missed the flight, and one of Wahlberg's friends decided not to fly to LA and go to Toronto instead so he flew to Toronto. Jackson was supposed to attend a meeting in the building but overslept and missed it as he spoke to his mum until 3am on the phone the previous night.

• Missing a bus - maybe you missed your first bus so that you would meet someone interesting on the next bus and strike up a friendship.

• A lost phone charger - maybe you lost it so you go to bed earlier and get a better night's sleep.

• Deciding to pick up a takeaway coffee on the way to work, except the barista is super busy that particular morning and your coffee doesn't come as quick as expected. This leads to you standing next to someone you would have normally missed (maybe a celebrity, maybe the love of your life, etc.).

• Political landscapes shifting directions (for the better, let's not look at the current political landscape rn).

• Matheus Saroli (the son of Chapecoense coach Caio Junior) was supposed to be on flight LMI2933 - a flight that had the Brazilian football team on it. The plane crashed on its way from Sao Paulo to Medellin. The crash killed 71 people on board, including Caio Junior. However, Matheus forgot his passport so did not board the flight. I also believe that I've heard about either a NZ or Australian rugby/footy team who all forgot their passports on a different flight that crashed but I'm unable to find any information on that and could be remembering it wrong, but I swear I've heard about it.

One psychologist, Cameron Williams, says that the burnt toast theory is about how people are turning chaos into cohesion. Something we all seek in life is meaning, and we find meaning in the mundane, like burnt toast. This theory is the way people make light of unpleasant situations.

The burnt toast theory can also help people cope with some of life's hardships - it's about seeing the glass half full rather than half empty (gah, I hate that trope). Blanchfield (2024) suggests that the burnt toast theory can help with self-compassion, encourage mindfulness, help one find clarity, and can help one move forward:

• Self-Compassion: The burnt toast theory can shed light on us being human i.e., we are not the only ones who burn our toast in the mornings.

• Encourage Mindfulness: When we are faced with minor setbacks, we often catastrophise and so when we think about the burnt toast theory, we are often more mindful of what is.

• Help One Find Clarity: Maybe you're struggling to make a decision and you're not sure what you want for breakfast so you take the last piece of bread and oh no, you've burnt it. But then you realise you've got your favourite cereal in the pantry and you realise that was healthier and more fulfilling than the toast was going to be.

• Help One Move Forward: And lastly, the burnt toast theory can help with closure. If we think the burnt toast led to X, then we might be more willing to accept why the burn toast scenario happened.

  
  

The burnt toast theory is all about accepting that life is hard sometimes but I think it doesn't fall into the toxic positivity mindset because there is the underlying concept that whatever happened to you was objectively bad i.e., who really wants to eat burnt toast? And then, there is a feeling that you can move forward from it - it doesn't always come at the time but we all know hindsight is 20/20. Some studies have demonstrated that those who tend to have a more positive mindset about bad things that happen to them are more likely to have reduced anxiety (Eagleson et al. 2016). I do want to point out here that the burnt toast theory isn't about trauma - we'll save that for the professionals, it's about mindset. It's a mindset that helps build resilience and optimism. It's also a mindset that can make us feel in control, especially if we suffer from hypervigilance.

On the flip side, if we happen to be someone with a more fixed mindset, maybe more prone to negativity bias, then it could be hard to challenge things such as negative self-talk, poor self-care routines, a lack of knowledge of our own success, and surrounding ourselves with negative reinforcements. The point of this is that sometimes things just suck and that's okay too.

And yes, I do have to point out that it could also go the other way too, i.e., if you burn your toast in the morning you could end up late and a catastrophe could play out (this could be classed as the butterfly effect). And yes, there's also a great movie with the same name ;)

We never really know which way things are going to turn out at the time. It's all about the way you look at it.

Thanks for reading!

Much love,

Ash xo

Readings/References

• Andersson, F. N. (2016). A blessing in disguise? Banking crises and institutional change. World Development, 83, 135-147.

• Eagleson, C., Hayes, S., Mathews, A., Perman, G., & Hirsch, C. R. (2016). The power of positive thinking: Pathological worry is reduced by thought replacement in Generalized Anxiety Disorder. Behaviour research and therapy, 78, 13–18. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.brat.2015.12.017

• Mulinda, F. (2021). A blessing in disguise? Political branding through covid-19 pandemic in Tanzania. The Dyke, 15(2), 58-71.

• https://thred.com/culture/is-tiktoks-burnt-toast-theory-a-solution-to-rising-anxiety-among-gen-z/

• https://www.refinery29.com/en-au/tiktok-burnt-toast-theory

• https://www.verywellmind.com/how-tiktok-s-burnt-toast-theory-can-help-life-8594568

• https://happiful.com/what-is-burnt-toast-theory-and-how-can-it-help-us-reframe-lifes-inconveniences

• https://medium.com/@thobanindlovu/the-burnt-toast-theory-e927eace2f5d

• https://www.adelaide.edu.au/student/wellbeing/news/list/2023/10/28/the-burnt-toast-theory

• https://www.womenshealthmag.com/life/a62705543/burnt-toast-theory/

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